10 months out!

Holy crap, I’m getting married 10 months from today! Thanks to The Knot for the reminder… I probably wouldn’t have even thought twice about it. Let’s review what we’ve gotten done, shall we?

• Church booked with our date, ceremony time TBD (mid-afternoon)
• Party site booked with our date, start time set
• Bought my dress
• Booked our DJ (meeting in February)
• Met with the priest marrying us
• Took the FOCCUS assessment
• Starting going over the answers to the assessment
• Secured our spot for the Engaged Couples weekend at the church
• Asked our peeps to be in our party! Then realized 3 of the 8 groomsmen will likely be deployed
• Made significant progress on the guest list
• Bought components of the centerpieces, decided how to complete them
• Inquired into a lighting scheme
• Went to a tasting
• Went bridesmaid dress shopping with the girls and picked the dress (to be ordered next month!)
• Bought the flower girl dresses (post on this in the future… just need to upload my pictures!)
• Considered invitation options
• Interviewed two photographers, and will make a decision within the next week
• Decided (mostly) against save-the-dates
• Brainstormed ideas for favors (mostly went like this: do we brew beer or do we brew hard cider?)
• Decided on the honeymoon plan

And things we haven’t quite gotten to yet, but plan to soon:

• Bands (rings)
• Ceremony details (readings, songs, etc.)
• Figure out the flower plan
• Invitations
• Programs (need to talk to the church)
• Hotels
• Transportation
• Booze
• Tuxes
• Engagement photos?
• Start booking honeymoon stuff
• Figure out the cake
• Find a new hairstylist for me– mine disappeared!
• Accessories and fun stuff
• Gifts for our peeps
• Rehearsal dinner plans
• Registry
• Wed-site

The last two are probably the most immediate. FMIL M had asked if we’d be registered before Christmas, which we most certainly aren’t. I hate the mall during the holidays– crowds make me really nervous. We’ll get there soon enough, though, once we figure out the direction we want to take. The wed-site is probably something I’ll mention as being done, but not posting here for privacy issues.

All in all, I think we’re on top of things!

Tough stuff

Yesterday’s Real Simple quote was:

Love is what you’ve been through with somebody. –James Thurber

It’s 100% true. Once you’ve gotten through the “honeymoon phase” when everything is sunshine, rainbows, and puppies, the real world intervenes and makes a relationship work. For us, the real world popped its head up about 3 months into our relationship, when we had to decide if we wanted to make our summer love (gag, Grease reference) into a long-distance relationship. We decided it was worth it, and never looked back. It strengthened our communication abilities, since we would talk on the phone more than actually seeing each other for 9 months of the year. But we made it, and now have each other to come home to at the end of a long workday. There’s nothing better.

The quote is also true in another facet for us. In the 5.5 years we’ve been together, both of our parents have gotten divorced. Neither of us saw it coming, but we’ve made it through it all together. The holidays are particularly tough.

This year, the FI and I made a venn diagram with our parents’ names on opposite corners and analyzed the overlaps to see who would “get” dinner and who would “get” dessert on Thanksgiving and Christmas. We agreed that we’d trade and one of our parents would get dinner on Thanksgiving, but the other’s would get dinner on Christmas, then the opposite for desert. Unfortunately, we didn’t take Easter into consideration, so that’ll be another battle.

The point is, Christmas isn’t the same. There is no end to the hurt feelings, the running around on the day-of, and the general stress of the season. It’s gotten to the point where I was in tears on Saturday afternoon trying to work it all out. Some of the assumptions we made in order to make the holiday mapping work out since changed, which changes all of the plans and adds another burden to planning and already-high emotions.

As awful as it sounds, it makes sense that my new favorite holiday (which I’ve written about before) is Oktoberfest, mostly due to its lack of expectations. You show up, drink some beer, chicken dance, and eat brats. If it doesn’t work out, no one’s disappointed. There are no family members to let down, and if you wind up staying home in your pajamas (like my ideal night for New Year’s Eve, the most over-hyped holiday EVER), no one judges you.

I’m sorry to be such a Debbie Downer with this post, but I thought it would be helpful for me to put it all in words. I’m trying to keep my chin up about it all, but am (clearly, as you can tell from this post) having a hard time.

Does anyone else find themselves struggling with the holidays?

Shout out!

The FI and I had Mum’s dad’s (Papa) family Christmas party this past Sunday, the first time we’ve been to an extended family gathering since our engagement. If you’ll remember (did I even mention it?), we were at FMIL MJ’s house for a small family dinner then up to Dad’s for dessert with another small group for Thanksgiving.

We entered the clubhouse at Nana and Papa’s condo complex to something that sounded a lot like “AAAAAAAAAAAAIIIEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!! LEMME SEE LEMME SEE OMG CONGRATULATIONS AAAAAAAAAIIIIIEEEEE!!!!!” which, to be honest, was lots of fun and completely overwhelming. After the FI melted into the background (“to get to know one of my groomsmen better” he later said), I showed off my ring and talked about our plans so far, which was definitely fun. It’s nice to have a new audience to gush to every once in a while, you know?

Overall, a good time was had by all.

You might be wondering where the title of this post comes in to this story. It comes in right about here. I’ve known for a while that Cousin/BM E is a reader of this lil blog (and a Weddingbee stalker, which is totally fine by me), and she told me that her mom, Auntie C, is also a reader. Cool, right? I also found out that Cousin/BM E’s dad (and Auntie C’s husband), Uncle T is a reader!

It’s official: I have the coolest Godparents ever. You’re so jealous.

Christmas card save-the-dates

Some of you know, some don’t, but I used to be on the National Leadership Team of a college program for the American Cancer Society. It was a ton of work, but I met a group of amazing people who are passionate, funny, and immensely talented.

The other day, I got what I thought was a Christmas card from one of my fellow former board members. I turned it over, and lo and behold, it was also a save-the-date! BRILLIANT! She’s getting married in June, so sending out her save-the-dates now is perfect, and combining them with Christmas cards kills two birds with one stone.

If we were sending STDs, I would totally steal this idea. We’d be sending ours out around April, though… does anyone send Happy Marathon Monday cards? I have a kind of hilarious idea, actually… “FI’s running the Marathon, /Leah’s there to cheer, /and they’re getting married /later this year!” (You see that poem action? God, I’m good.) The image is something like our heads superimposed on cartoon bodies, FI running and me holding a sign that says YAY! or something.

Stand by… I might make STDs after all. But just for far-away people. Right.

These are a few of my favorite things…

Side note: I sang that for an audition in high school once. Got me in the musical.

I’m a fan of the “survey” type meme thingies (boy, am I descriptive) that float around the web, and in taking a mental break and perusing my Google Reader, I happened upon this post from Meg. I think she’s super-cool, though I’ve never met her in person. And she makes fab lists and surveys, so yay. Here’s another one, inspired by fashion magazines. Oh and another PS- she’s Canadian, but I left her spellings of “favourite” because they make me smile. Deal.

Your look:
Favourite clothing store to shop in? The Gap or Old Navy, but I get a lot from Target too
Favourite brand of jeans, or place to buy jeans? Gap Long and Lean jeans are my favorite. I have wicked long legs!
Favourite brand of shoe (and type of shoe)? I love my Ugg Classic Tall boots, and I love my LL Bean moccasins. Evidently, I love tan suede shoes with shearling lining. I can’t live without my black Reef flip flops in the summer, though!
Favourite brand of handbag? Vera Bradley, I guess… I’m not much into bags
Favourite clothing influence (relative, celebrity, something)? I don’t really have one– if I see something I like in the store or online, I might pick it up.
Favourite brand of running shoe? Asics? I don’t even know what brand my sneakers are!
Favourite accessory (scarves, rings, belts, hats, tiny dogs) and where you find it? I love, love, love my black hat. It’s Marmot, and I bought it at REI to replace an almost identical North Face one I lost I also love my carved leather belt with big-ass belt buckle, which I bought on our vacation in Steamboat upon realizing cowboy boots are freaking EXPENSIVE. My favorite accessory of all, though, is my engagement ring, of course!

Your feel:
Favourite body soap or wash?I usually use Olay bar soap, but I love experimenting. I rarely use the same thing twice in a row.
Favourite fragrance? For me, Vera Wang Princess. For the FI, Ralph Lauren Romance Silver. YUM.
Favourite moisturizer (face)? Neutrogena Daily Moisture or Tinted Moisturizer
Favourite moisturizer (body)? The Body Shop Shea Body Butter. I’m almost out!
Favourite lip balm (see? I made it unisex!)? Chapstick. I like the plain kind and Naturals kinds the best, and I almost always have one on me.
Favourite physical indulgence and where you indulge it (massage, long hot showers, pedicures, facials, etc.)? I take a screaming hot shower every morning (there’s no heat in the bathroom!), but I like to take longer ones at night sometimes. And I loooooove pedis. I’ve never had a massage or a facial, but would love to try.

Your surroundings:
Favourite place to be/live? I love being home with the FI. Even if he’s not there, it’s just so “us” and comfy. I’d love to give living in Colorado or Vermont a shot.
Favourite place to vacation? Colorado and Key West
Favourite sheets (fabric, thread count, brand if you want)? My jersey sheets in college were soooo comfy. Now I like the striped ones we have that don’t ride up on the bed and fall off.
Favourite architectural style? I like Colonial-style houses, but only if they have a farmer’s porch. I like Art Deco, too, like the Chrysler Building.
Favourite form of lighting (big windows, candlelight, overhead fluorescence)? Millions of enormous windows. I hate not having one right near me at work! Candlelight’s wonderful, though.
Favourite piece of furniture (bed, sofa, bathtub, etc.)? My bed. I love my bed more than a lot of things. At the end of the day, I love sinking into it and snuggling in. You know how much I love snuggling.
Favourite time of year/weather? I love the fall, which is why we’re getting married then, and I loooooove snow. Or bright, cold, sunny days.

BONUS: Your belly:
Favourite beverage: Beer or tea. The beer should be cold, but the tea can be hot or iced.
Favourite ethnic cuisine: Mexican food. Dios mio, me encantan las enchiladas.
Favourite snack food: Chocolate. Cheez-Its are pretty solid, too. Can’t go wrong.
Favourite meal: Brunch is kind of fantastic, but dinner also rocks pretty hardcore. And dessert. Hell, I just love eating.
Favourite breakfast: It definitely depends on the day. I’m a fan of French toast, but I also enjoy some good over-medium eggs with hashbrowns, bacon and toast. I want that for dinner now. Too bad we have neither hashbrowns nor bacon. Sad face.

What about YOU? What are some of your favorite things?

http://www.megfowler.com/2009/12/06/le-survey/http://www.megfowler.com/2009/12/06/le-survey/

Christmas Eve

Christmas Eve is one of my favorite days of the year. It’s the calm before the storm of Christmas Day. We would always go to Mass in the evening, usually sitting with family friends, then go to Nana and Papa’s for Chinese food, and reading the passage in the Bible (you should see their Bible– it’s chock-full of cards, newspaper clippings, programs, and other family paraphernalia… Cousins E or C, want to comment?) about the birth of Jesus. Once we were sufficiently sleepy, we’d head home, where there was always one present for us kids under the tree, the only one from Mum and Dad. It was always pajamas, and Lil Bro and me would race to see who could put them on the fastest. Then it was time for bed, and Mum would watch It’s a Wonderful Life and wrap all the presents from Santa.

It’s different now that I’m not living at home. The FI and I have decided to take Christmas Eve for ourselves, before the storm of making eleventy-seven stops on Christmas Day. Know the movie “Four Christmases” that came out last year? Ours isn’t so different, except we haven’t lied to our families about doing charity work while going on vacation. And our relationship is very different, what with getting married and the expectation of having kids and all that. And our families aren’t quite as crazy as the ones in the movie. But the chaos is still there.

Last year, we opted to see Mum in the afternoon for our gift of pajamas, then have Chinese food for dinner and go to midnight Mass. It was great, except the Chinese food was ridiculously late (like over an hour late), so we were stressed out about that, and we almost missed Mass because we were in food comas and fell asleep on the couch.

This year, we’ll probably see Mum in the afternoon again (gotta have those PJs!), but I’m planning to make dinner instead of doing Chinese food. I still haven’t mentioned this to the FI, but I can’t imagine he’ll object based on the ridiculosity we went through last year.

I’m thinking of using this slow-cooker pot roast recipe, then making mashed potatoes (or maybe garlic smashed potatoes), green beans, and dinner rolls. We’ll have leftovers out the wazoo, but that’s never made a difference! Maybe we’ll go for some red wine to have with dinner, or maybe we’ll chill some of the excellent beers we’ve been gifted for our engagement. Or drink some of our newest home-brew, Dark and Stormy Dunkelweizen. The options are endless.

And we’ll set an alarm for Mass.

Nom, nom, nom

I love food. I love to eat, I love to cook, and I love to bake. It’s all good. Except mushrooms… I don’t like mushrooms.

Anywho, I’ve had a few foodie ideas and/or cravings lately, moreso than usual. So here they are.

Baby green salad

As I was going to bed on Friday night, I started thinking about salads for some reason. I wanted one that was really fancy and had tons of flavor. I wanted baby spinach. And cranberries. And candied walnuts. And goat cheese (which I’ve only had once or twice). With raspberry vinaigrette (which I’ve never tasted before).

I went to sleep, but proceeded to think about it the rest of the weekend. So last night, I went to Stop & Shop to pick up a few ingredients. I got some baby greens (cheaper than just baby spinach), honey-roasted almonds (no candied walnuts where I was looking– where would they be?), some goat cheese, and some fat-free raspberry vinaigrette from Maple Grove Farms of Vermont. Note on the last purchase: they’re highly recommended by the Eat this, Not that book, and I’ve had the honey mustard before, which was delish. Highly recommended.

I had some leftover roast chicken from dinner the other night, and already had dried cranberries, so those were all set. I put them all together last night (minus the dressing), and am very excited for lunch today.

Southern dinner

Dad was born in Nashville, and there’s been a little southern influence on my taste. It was dormant until a few years ago, though, when I first tasted pulled pork. YUM. Saturday morning, I had a crazy urge to make a full-blown southern dinner:

• Pulled pork in the Crock Pot
• Cornbread
• Baked mac and cheese
• Sweet tea
• Firefly vodka for spiking the sweet tea
• Red velvet cupcakes

Tell me you’re not drooling. I might try to make it Saturday.

Stay tuned for another post soon (like tomorrow) about the Christmas Eve feast I’m planning.

Fake cultural traditions

It’s nearing Christmastime, when all your family’s traditions come out to play. My family is mostly Irish-German (which explains why I like beer so much), and we’ve always hung a glass pickle ornament from our Christmas tree. The story goes that it’s an old German tradition that the parents hang the pickle deep in the tree’s boughs on Christmas Eve, and whoever finds the pickle first the next morning gets a special prize. Isn’t that nice? I mean, aside from the fact that it may have caused Lil Bro and I to knock over the tree in an effort to find the dang pickle.

But it’s fake.

I just had what Mum described (when I told her) as a “balloon > pin > psssssss” moment. It was like finding my letters to the Tooth Fairy and Santa and maybe even the Easter Bunny in the top of the medicine cabinet when I was young (true story).

According to these articles I’ve found on Google, the tradition is American and somehow got pinned on the Germans. From what I’ve read, the German tie comes from a town in Germany that’s famous for its blown-glass ornaments, many of which are in fruit or nut shapes.

I immediately emailed Mum to ask her what other pseudo-cultural traditions we observe might be fake (wearing green and drinking Guinness on St. Patrick’s Day immediately came to mind). She gently asked if I knew St. Paddy’s Day was a bigger deal here than it is in Ireland, which I knew. But she was, in her words “verklempt” that the pickle tradition was a fake.

Naturally, I bought a few of the dang pickles to give as gifts this year, so writing the “tradition” behind them will be an exercise in creative storytelling.

Have you ever had a “balloon > pin > psssssss” moment about one of your traditions or beliefs? What was it?

Complicated honeymoon plans

I mentioned before that our honeymoon won’t likely be your standard tropical getaway. Since when do we do anything standard here?

In a bout of inability to focus, I took a stab at working around the big tour companies to create a sweet trip for us. Remember that we want to take at least two weeks, so that was my basis. And I did include some sun (most likely) just to mix it up a bit.

Royal Caribbean 7-night Mediterranean cruise

Here’s the link to the overview. We’ll fly into Barcelona, then hop on the ship a few hours later. Here are the ports of call:

• Barcelona, Spain
• Naples, Capri, Italy
• Civitavecchia (Rome), Italy
• Livorno (Florence/Pisa), Italy
• Villefranche (Nice), France
• Provence (Toulon), Franc
• Barcelona, Spain

And the prices really aren’t bad, either. We’d probably opt for the interior room, since we won’t spend much time in there anyway.

Rent a car in Barcelona

Once we get back from the cruise, I thought it would be fun to rent a car in Barcelona and start driving to Munich. The car rental would probably be a bit expensive, but the driving time between all the destinations in between only ranges from 1.5 hours to 5.5 hours, totally doable. Plus, since we’re driving ourselves, we can make other stops along the way, other than the overnights in:

• Montpellier, France (because we love Montpelier, VT so much!)
• Bern and Zurich, Switzerland
• Innsbruck, Austria
• Berchtesgaden, Germany
• Munich, Germany

We’d probably stay a couple nights in Munich to take in all the sights and drink gallons of beer. I figure we would probably take 5-7 days to do all the driving, depending on how we feel. PS- I love Google Maps and the ability to save the trips you’ve created. Genius!

Then we’d fly back home from Munich.

So in our whirlwind tour of Western and Central Europe, we’d have two one-way flights, a cruise, a rental car, and some hotels. I still have to look in to international driving laws and how much time we’d be spending at border crossings.

Does anyone still work with travel agents? Can you recommend one? I have a feeling this might be tough to plan myself, especially since I’ve never traveled internationally before.

Puppy cravings

I don’t mean eating puppies, I promise.

What I mean is that the FI and I aren’t allowed to have a dog at our apartment. When we signed the lease, the understanding was that we could get a cat and let the landlord know. The possibility was also raised later in the year that she might be accepting of a small dog. As I mentioned before, the FI and I want big dogs. Two of ‘em. Tessie is/will be our Boxer, and Hans is/will be our Bernese Mountain Dog. Neither breed could ever be considered a “small dog.” They’re big even as puppies!

The FI and I are both big dog people, and whenever we visit our moms (they both have dogs), we leave wishing we were going home to our own dog(s). Whenever friends have their dogs around, we’re the ones sitting right next to them with bellyrubs.

Here’s my thought (it’s a little bit of a digression, but stick with me). We have had a few renovations at our apartment since moving in, including a new bathroom that still isn’t 100% finished. Here’s a post from APRIL talking about how it’s *almost* done. We have a mirror, but still no heat in the new bathroom. We live in Massachusetts and it’s December. The tile floor is brutal in the morning!

There has also been a whole lot of conversation regarding a new kitchen that’s supposed to be going in. Our landlord told us some work was supposed to be started last Monday (filling in cracks in the foundation and other such small-time items), with demolition on the old bathroom and kitchen to be started just after Thanksgiving. PS- that’s this week. We asked our landlord last weekend when we should start moving stuff out of the kitchen for construction, and she said they’d likely be at the house on Monday to start. Sweet! We spent a lot of time over the weekend moving stuff in the office to make room for kitchen stuff and actively packing just about everything in the kitchen for storage in the office.

Then we heard demo wouldn’t start until Tuesday, but the carpenter was coming over Monday to do work. Fine. One day is ok. Plus, he was supposed to be over a week ago to do that work. The FI got home when the carpenter was still over, and asked when we should expect to move out. The carpenter said NEXT WEEK. When the FI told me this, I let loose a string of profanities that would make George Carlin blush. We are working with a near-empty kitchen and an overfull office, neither of which is really usable in its current state. For. Another. Week.

Not only that, but I’ve had to call MOH S and her boyfriend every day to let them know when to expect us. We have to move out of our apartment for a few days, and the stipend our landlord is giving us isn’t enough to cover a hotel room, and they have extra space, so we’re crashing with them. And we love them for being so patient with us. And teaching us how to play Super Mario for the Wii and not minding that we use up all their lives. Anyway.

So back to the original story: the puppy. Or young dog, either way. What I’ve been thinking is that the FI and I have been really good about this whole debacle. The year-long construction on the bathroom, the never-to-start kitchen… we’ve been very patient. We haven’t withheld rent, we haven’t complained too much, and we haven’t bitched out the contractors for slacking (though I came dangerously close a few times). We’re great tenants overall, too: we always pay on time, we rarely have parties (and she’s invited when we do), we don’t block the driveway, and we keep community property really neat. It’s not part of the lease, but we plan to be there at least another year before we buy a house, so she won’t have to worry about finding new tenants.

Do you think we have a little wiggle room if we ask our landlord if we can get a Boxer? Or should we just keep on waiting until we buy a house and can finally have a dog of our own?